walking around in the dark

Do you go for walks before bed? This time of year I imagine one might have to walk down the middle of the street to make any time, but I remember doing that sort of thing as a teenager -- I worked at McDonalds over in Robbinsdale when I was 16, and because my grades were generally pretty good my parents let me be a closer; so I was often biking home at midnight (McDonalds closed earlier 20 years ago). At midnight in Robbinsdale you had no idea what was going on in North Mpls back then; it was very quiet, though there were trains. And I could ride down the middle of the road with complete disregard, which is a big deal when you're 16, I guess.

I think my aversion to cars stems somewhat from the awareness even then that without a bicycle I would not have been able to take the hours I did, at work, as a young woman -- having parents with no money could mean no job for you as well. You're brought up from an early age knowing that if you don't have a car, as a woman you face ten times more danger at night. You were beholden to guys for transportation on any date too, which created other hassles. The whole situation seemed strikingly unfair to me right off the bat, so I planned accordingly. In my twenties, when I'd go downtown for concerts at First Ave or etc, I'd often ride my bike. It was safer than bussing, particularly when I lived in Phillips. (Crossing the freeway from downtown on 11th by bike was pretty non-intimidating, whereas the walk from Chicago and 19th (just 2 blocks) could seem positively suicidal, after midnight.) Anyway, I had more money than most people I knew, when I was young, in part because I didn't have a car to feed -- and for kids anywhere, money and freedom are what it's all about. I figured out I could be free without enslaving myself to a car, or to the necessity of conformity, and that's what I did. The political advantages came later. Now it's hard for me to want to give it up. My kid is an enthusiastic bus-rider, and being married keeps me off the streets at night well enough.

But, I miss being able to just walk out the door and go somewhere, this time of night. It would worry my husband sick, even if I were just riding around the neighborhood, which is a legitimate position for him. I have to limit my excursions to the yard. Like a dog.

That's another thing -- I get heartily sick and tired of hearing men talk about the age-old evil of having their activities curtailed in any way by women -- because men are the reason women can't enjoy a whole host of otherwise harmless activities, sans armed guard. My husband may sometimes think ten years is too long to have a woman telling you how you may run your life, but I've been planning my life around the potential for male violence since I was old enough to understand the issue. And got mugged a couple times anyway. So, stow it guys. Someday when you do a better job of managing your testosterone, you can let us gals walk around carefree after dark, and receive the same courtesy in return.