Wednesday, July 9, 2008


A morning of meetings looms. That's my excuse for lingering at home a little while longer than I should, listening to the "Amelie" soundtrack and having the sort of rainy-day feelings that this augments. I have some laundry to hang in the sunshine (gotta call Centerpoint about the dryer, good thing we have a clothes line and don't live in Eden Prairie.)

This music gets on my son's nerves after about 20 minutes, at which time he'll run to the stereo and shut it off. It's very overwrought, jangly music that catapults from ecstasy to sorrow and back again, over and over. I imagine it's too much for him. I remember being his age, and just dreading one particular album my mother liked -- the soundtrack for "The Good, the Bad & the Ugly." Specifically the theme song, with the whistling and the men grunting, and the low-pitch harmonica --- very creepy. I'd always run away or stop my ears. It was something real but unseen, frightening in that particular way that sounds can sometimes still bother me. SO I feel for the kid, and I won't play this while he is around.

If I don't get up out of this chair, I'm going to run out of time to work on my project, which is the other reason I'm dragging my feet this morning. The guys leave late, this summer session, because R's class doesn't start until 10:30. I look into next week, and see that summer is half gone, and I'm depressed -- we waited so long for it this year. I actually had a dream, Sunday morning, that we couldn't go to the Farmer's Market because it had snowed overnight.

On the other hand, our garden looks lovely. I wish I could just sit out there all day in the sunshine, holding onto all the people I love, and be no more inside myself than if it were just a postcard of the scene. It's not such a big deal to be me, don't get me wrong. It's just rainy-day thoughts, on a sunny morning.

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